Saturday, August 01, 2009

Nativeland is finished and our 25 month anniversary approaches

I can hardly believe I'm saying this - time has gone so quickly. We have now been waiting for our referral for 25 months, as of the 4th of August 2009.

Relatives and friends and other soon-to-be-adoptive parents who have been waiting with us sometimes assume that we're sad about such a long wait, anxious maybe, even frustrated.

That would be a fair assumption but I have only felt a little anxious for a few days at the 24 month mark. The feeling passed in a short time and wasn't painful ;) so it's all good and hopeful here in our part of the world. Scott is the picture of patience, always has been. I've had to learn how to be patient and,man oh man, doesn't the adoption process teach you that in full measure!

Recently, friends of ours L & G (who live about 15 minutes from here) received their referral of a gorgeous little fellow who I was fortunate enough to see a photo of. Spending time with C's Mum and Dad and another adoptive mother whose family we have a bit of contact with from time to time, drove it home to me exactly how it will feel when our own little cherub is finally revealed to us.

Such excitement and yearning sated, for a little while anyhow, by a series of small, 2D pictures of little C. Finally, a sweet face to put to the dreams and wonderings of a couple of years of waiting.

About a week after visiting and sharing their great news, I was in peak hour traffic on my way to work only to receive a phone call from our friendly Adoption Caseworker, J. To say I nearly rear-ended the guy in the car in front would be an accurate reflection of how surprised I was to hear from J. Rarely do you get to hear from your caseworker during the waiting time as, quite simply, there isn't anything to report unless a referral comes up or you need to do a review (yearly).

But no, J was just needing a bit more detail following our fairly recent review and my heart had to stop thudding with excitement and expectation so I could concentrate on driving safely to work.

In that moment I got another glimpse of what it will be like to FINALLY receive our referral. Kinda cool!

On our Yahoo Thai Adoption list, there has been a little sharing of the recent events at Nativeland (every four years Thailand invites it's adoptees and their families to return to their home country for a cultural visit over 1-2 weeks).

We were told late last year that things can considerably slow down around Nativeland as the majority of Thai adoption staff are involved with preparations for this event. Completely understandable and, from what we hear from those returning from their cultural visit, absolutely a must for adoptees and families who wish to get to know their birth country in a more in-depth fashion.

There were also, to my surprise, a few reported referrals throughout this time. One family in NZ were given a referral after 14 months waiting and travelled to Thailand a couple of weeks later to bring their little one home. From referral to travel is usually 2-3 months so this family experienced very good fortune indeed as well as an early referral time on average. The average these days moves towards 24 - 28 months.

A Victorian couple received a referral also although I don't know anything more about this particular one.

After our long wait, I'm still feeling very positive about the Thai adoption process. We've always felt very comfortable with how Thailand describes the reasons for the wait times to prospective adoptive parents. Their sound reasoning and process gives us the security to know that, wherever possible, Thailand are looking out for their sons and daughters in the most responsible way.

Some day soon, I'll be able to report our own good fortune. Maybe we've already been matched and our referral will come through soon ... who knows?

Wish us luck!

Kim